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| Dog Poetry |
| Showing The Truth - By fed up Exhibitor....... The Journey Planned, Grooming stuff ready, for that ludicrous hour to leave, The travel sickness tablets are taken, though the dog will no doubt still heave. Patiently waiting, your dogs all ready, your nerves begin to hit, You nervously look and check again, oh no it’s gone from your grooming kit. Dogs Brushed up ,the butterflies churning, you feel your racing heart. And so it begins, the steward calls , the judge is ready to start. Suddenly it’s clear; it’s all an act, for her face wears that tell tale frown. Why bother with teeth, going over the dog Or finishing the up and down. Come on Madam, be honest here, we know who should win this class. Don't waste our time and try to pretend that this is not just an elaborate farce. Stevey wonder could see the rightful winner, you can't miss her soundness and flare. You can't be that stupid, don't tell me please, you don’t know the best dog there. Your teeth a grind, your anger wells, its hard to keep calm as you might, It Surely can't be another show where the Clairvoyants were really right. The next few seconds pass in a blur, definitely in a haze. Avoiding eye contact, up the lead, the judge she does a gaze, I guess its no surprise to hear again…. the judge she did a Rob, Yes its so, her preordained exhibitor WAS the final BOB. No Doubt tomorrow, We think this judge , in the group will definitely show, Under today's best of Breed, no hiding its what we all know. Or Maybe something else, it seems they will ado, hard to believe oh yes it is but take shut up and pull another tissue. Shame on you, this dog show game has really gone to the pot, The instances of it happening, seems much more often than not. A Favour for you, If you Play the game a different world you will see. So tell me please, is there anyone left who will still judge Honestly. So why do we do this, with what we know, we really should not go along, We pay the entries, say our prays and hope to hell we are wrong. So the Valium ataken, You've finally calmed and can think about your next show. Ring ring goes the phone….. WHAT you say......I wont believe where the next ticket will go....... |
| A Dog Show Poem...... Author Unknown There was a time, there really was, when I was young and tender; When SHOW DOG meant a Disney Star, and BITCH was not a gender, I went to bed at half past ten; I went to Church on Sunday; On Saturday I baked the beans, and did the wash on Monday. But when I got a Certain Pup, and an erstwhile friend said, "SHOW," And so I did and so I do, OH! What I didn't know. I used to dress with flair and style, that was the life, don't knock it. But now each dress from bed to ball must have a good bait pocket. I used to have a certain air, I wallowed in perfume, I used to smell of Nuit D'Amour, now I smell like Mr. Groom. My furniture was haute d'cour, my pets a tank of guppies. Now I've furniture that is unstuffed, and well-adjusted puppies. Once I spoke in pristine prose in dulcet tones and frail, But now I'm using language that would turn a sailor pale. I was taught to be well-groomed no matter where I went. Now all the grooming that I do is in the Handler's tent. I used to long for furs and jewels and a figure classed as super, Now the thing I yearn for most is a nice new Pooper-Scooper. I adored a man who murmured verse through intimate little dinners, But now the words I thrill to hear are just three -- "Best of Winners". I rise at dawn and pack the van, the road a head's a long one. The one I routed on the map's invariably the wrong one. I really love this doggy life, I wouldn't care to change it. But when I get that BEST IN SHOW I plan to rearrange it; And when my time on earth is done I'll go without much nudging Just give me three weeks closing date and let me know who's judging. |
| Why own a dog??? - Author Unknown Why own a dog? There's a danger you know, You can't own just one, for the craving will grow. There's no doubt they're addictive, wherein lies the danger. While living with lots you'll grow poorer and stranger. One dog is no trouble, and two are so funny. The third one is easy, the fourth one's a honey. The fifth one delightful, the sixth one's a breeze, You find you can live with a houseful with ease. So how 'bout another? Would you really dare? They're really quite easy but oh, Lord the hair! With dogs on the sofa and dogs on the bed, And crates in the kitchen,it's no bother you've said. They're really no trouble,their manners are great. What's just one more dog and just one more crate? The sofa is hairy,the windows are crusty, The floor is all footprints,the furniture dusty. The housekeeping suffers, but what do you care? Who minds a few nose prints and a little more hair? So let's keep a puppy, you can always find room, And a little more time for the dust cloth and broom. There's hardly a limit to the dogs you can add, The thought of a cut back sure makes you sad. Each one is so special, so useful, so funny. The vet, the food bill grows larger,you owe money. Our folks never visit, few friends come to stay, Except other dog folks, who all live the same way. Your lawn has now died,and your shrubs are dead too, But your weekends are busy, you're off with your crew. There's dog food and vitamins, training and shots. And entries and travel and motels which cost lots. Is it worth it, you wonder? Are you caught in a trap? Then your favorite dog comes and climbs in your lap. His look says you're special and you know that you will Keep all of the critter sin spite of the bill. Some just for showing and some just to breed. And some just for loving, they all fill a need. But winter's a hassle, the dogs hate it too. But they must have their walks though they're numb and you're blue. Late evening is awful, you scream and you shout At the dogs on the sofa who refuse to go out. The dogs and the dog shows, the travel, the thrills; The work and the worry,the pressure, the bills. The whole thing seems worth it, the dogs are your life. They're charming and funny and offset the strife. Your lifestyle has changed. Things won't be the same. Yes, those dogs are addictive and so is the dog game! |